The Human Condition

by Austin Taft

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    Includes unlimited streaming via the free Bandcamp app, plus high-quality downloads of Skeletons, The Human Condition, War of the Songs of Light Against the Songs of Darkness, Fragments of The Absolute [EP], and Beneath The Sun and Beyond The Reach of God. , and , .

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1.
WANDERING SOULS: So here we are -- two wandering souls On the precipice of the most important day of our life I didn't know you wanted out Looking for the great escape and finding it Happiness is a long ways away from a thing called love But you can't convince me that we couldn't be somewhere sort of close When you run away, can I wait for you somehow? Can I wait for you now? So what about me? My life is in pieces I'm left to discover the rest of my journey alone When I'm without you, I don't feel right But I'm trying to cope I'm trying to move on I'm trying to hold on But happiness is a long ways away from a thing called love And I remember you and the way that I felt when I held you in my arms Don't run away; can I wait for you somehow? Can I wait for you now? Happiness is a long ways away from a thing called love And I feel ashamed that I can't look away from your etchings in my heart When you ran away, I thought I could wait for you somehow But the wait is wearing me down I'm still waiting for you now
2.
Moving Day 04:41
MOVING DAY: Hey! It's not been long since I've departed, and I'm right back where I started Is this home where the heart is? For whatever the reason, my balance is uneven And I'm thinking I should try something new Season after season, it seems like I've been beaten But I know that I can get this So I've got some of my plan mapped out Not too much, but enough for now And I've found a place to pick myself back up And everything I own is in a great big box Alongside some smaller boxes loaded in a van My prideful soul is open, if only for a moment 'Cause my whole world has exploded, and I don't know where I am Where will I end up? It's such a disconnection when I'm changing my direction But I'm so excited now There's nothing like new surroundings to ground me It's moving day Moving day And changes are underway It's moving day Moving day We're chasing our dreams I can't wait I can't wait much longer What's "home" anyway? Searching for answers moving backwards with my head in the rafters will lead me to disaster My hope is just around the corner if I keep moving forward and breaking down the borders But my fears, they keep on running; my fears, they keep on running into each other There's peace within a motto, and the promise of tomorrow fills my heart with wonder It's moving day Moving day And changes are underway It's moving day Moving day We're chasing our dreams
3.
A DIFFERENT KIND: Living in fear of decisions that might be made irrationally I cannot focus on the larger canvas in front of me This shit is fucking with me, and I need to move on Everything needs to change I need to reclaim my soul to be happy To be myself, to find a way to be myself again To be allowed to be myself again A different kind of life Unable to decide, it hurts my pride to be so weak I cannot push myself toward the larger purpose in front of me I need to let it out, and now more than ever, it's time to release the chains Everything needs to change I need to reclaim my life to be happy To be myself, to find a way to be myself again To be allowed to be myself again A different kind of soul Weighing the pros and cons The potential for greatness and disaster All I ever wanted was to be in peace And to be honest, I want to trust, I do But in seeking a sense of respite There is nothing predestined And I'll wipe this memory from the slate of my spirit And with this weight lifted, I will ascertain my reason to be I'll find a way to be myself again I'll be allowed to be myself again And I will be myself again
4.
THE LETTERS OF UTRECHT: I will not be here always; it is of no concern, for it is your turn We'll take our language to the streets to begin thinking in the long term A corrosion of love is infesting our home, but time can be a guide now And message evolves as we are involved To know where we have been, to see where we will go We find ourselves wanting and questioning just how to fit these pieces together We wonder and wonder and welcome expression stretched through generations And it is no measure of success to leave a world without your mark So, godspeed, you people, the message is yours We'll watch from the stars as consciousness slowly unfolds Cross the sea of reason and hatred, disbelief and sparse empathy And everything we ever loved waves goodbye As we lead ourselves downward to ruin, but understanding this heart This magical moment Right now I'm here with you right now The lamp gives you shade for the letters divided through careful speech and tongue As nations decline, an advancing, refined communication will rise Nothing is perfect, but what we create and have now is here and it's ours And nothing can take that away from us -- not fate or fear or men or god or time Cross the sea of brothers and province and discourse and sparse empathy And we find in our hearts that we've foolishly wagered our souls But we are trying our best, and that's all we can do All anyone can ever ask of us, all they could ask of you And we will try We will I'm here with you right now
5.
Daydream 05:29
DAYDREAM: Going through the motions in my every day-to-day Searching for atonement in my own peculiar way There's always a hurdle, a barrier to break through Some folks can remember more, and some remember less And life's a grand adventure on the quest for happiness I took it to the road last night to try and lighten my head I was driving down I-55 and Don Williams was playing And I thought of you, I thought of you, I thought of you Lost inside a melody of timelessness and memories and trust The stars up in the sky are just like polka dots to me The satellites take pictures of their bright intensity And if there's a heaven up there, I'd swear it has familiarity Sittin' on the porch last night, the neighbor's dog was barking And I thought of you, I thought of you, I thought of you I want to say this carefully, and I hope that you can understand me now I think you know the way I feel about you 'Cause everyone has seen it in my smile I have higher self esteem locked inside my daydream But I'll try, and the chance is worthwhile And I've known you for a long, long time And I've wondered how long I will be alone But now I find it's something I always knew And it's about time to say, "I love you" Many are the nights in which I've laid in bed awake Hoping I can fall asleep so I can see your face And in the day, it's quite the same, my thoughts are far away I think it's 'cause I feel safest in my space It's hard to be rejected when your feelings aren't reflected in what you say And sometimes my intentions are really just extensions of my fears But every day contains a moment when I'm not too focused And I think of you, I really do, I think of you I need to say this carefully, and I hope you don't misunderstand me now I think you know the way I feel about you 'Cause everyone has seen it in my smile I have higher self esteem locked inside my daydream But I'll try, and the chance is worthwhile And I've known you for a long, long time And I've wondered how long I will be alone But now I find it's something I always knew And it's about time to say, "I love you"
6.
Rose 04:16
ROSE: Glass stains the sheets my mistress wore Let down your lavender gown and let me see where I should be until morning Please stay with me I won't be lost Let down your goldenrod hair And show me that you know me and you want to stay It's all so simple Yes, I know you know you want to stay Find where my rose has gone Find where my rose has gone This cannot fade This eternal dream I don't want to see the sun shine through my window 'Cause I know you know you want to stay It's all so simple Yes, I know you know you want to stay Find where my rose has gone Find where my rose has gone Find where my rose has gone Find where my rose has gone
7.
Ultimatum 05:58
ULTIMATUM: It's hard to explain how I feel now My chest is a little bit tight The more you don't say, the harder it is to breathe It seems we've come full circle A sense of déjà vu I don't like the way this feels at all An ultimatum unintentionally disguised I find it hard to fathom and harder to imagine How all can lead to nothing in an instant Do you realize your defenses? To be in the natural To be in a safe place, to take refuge where the harm is minimal I thought I was stronger than this I thought I was stronger than this My words replaced with silent emotion My cares are now insensible The more I think, the harder it is to breathe I hate to disappoint you And I don't want to run away But there is one thing and only one that has never betrayed me I thought I was stronger than this I thought I was stronger than this I thought I was stronger than this I thought I was stronger than this
8.
NOTHING IS REAL: My tears are crying as they're pouring out my eyes With life suspended, I can't be afraid to try I watch my chances -- one by one, they pass me by And I know where I stand, and I know how I feel But deep inside I know somehow that none of this is real And I know how I feel My feelings come and take me from this bed inside my home Take me to a place where I can live and die alone And I know how I feel -- I'm feeling unprepared I'm not sure if I'll make it -- why am I so scared? I'm told that god is with me, but I know he's not there The light shines through and now my eyes are blinded by the glare on my soul My tears are crying as they're pouring out my eyes I feel so insecure; I'm feeling so unsafe I'm feeling so uncomfortable; I'm feeling so afraid I hate and love and cry so loud Make it go away My tears are crying as they're pouring out my eyes Deep in my soul I feel like there's nothing left for me to be Here there is no madness; it's the calm before the storm Sheltered from the world, I'm a bitter, old man that you cannot see You can run along faster, but I swear I'll catch up to you You can try to run and hide, but I swear I'll find you now 'Cause nothing here is real
9.
Superheroes 04:26
SUPERHEROES: Is it my imagination Or is there some kind of code Some kind of force Every obstacle that's superimposed I can break it down Is it my imagination Or is there some kind of love Some kind of pulse I can feel the blood that runs through me I can hear the tune that hums through me It's like I'm in a tale Almost too much to believe Every minute in a chapter well beyond the scope of dreams From episode to episode The potential is exposed And with my friends beside me I do not feel alone We are superheroes The universe waves hello We are superheroes And all creation has its gold Our stories are magic and love and pain and science and spirit And everything is within our reach when we try We are superheroes in our own right There is no more hiding now We've come out from the shade It's laughter and light And I love a happy ending We are superheroes The universe waves hello We are superheroes And all creation has its gold Our stories are magic and love and pain and science and spirit And everything is within our reach when we try We are superheroes in our own right We are superheroes filled with pride Superheroes that can provide Superheroes in our own right We are superheroes in our own right
10.
PORTRAIT IN MY HEAD: I hear the changing winds I feel them blowing on my face But I do not fear change at all I want nothing more than to move on with my life But some bridges are standing tall This should kill me; it cannot fulfill me For what is a life without peace? How I envy the man who walks free Who isn't tied down by memories When I close my eyes, I cannot escape the portrait in my head When I close my eyes, I cannot escape the portrait in my head I will pay any price to escape This shame in my mind This pain in my mind I live each day knowing it waits for me at night And they say a picture lasts a lifetime This should kill me; it cannot fulfill me For what is a life without peace? How I envy the man who walks free Who isn't tied down or bound by memories When I close my eyes, I cannot escape the portrait in my head When I close my eyes, I cannot escape the portrait in my head If a picture says a thousand words... ...then I am a thousand times cursed
11.
THE EMPTY SCAN: Her puffy eyes have been crying again From the truth on an empty scan That she's felt since the bleeding began In her mind, she knows she's a failure The memories persevere through falling tears And there's nothing that can make it stop hurting How can you grieve? How can you breathe, When you never even get to say goodbye? And the doctor said, "This is perfectly normal" And she said, "I don't give a fuck how normal it is" And she feels so hollow and so much pain And now she is 1 in 4 She'll carry a burden if not a baby At least not for now But will she carry the burden alone? She told no one she was expecting How can she tell someone that she has miscarried?
12.
Shoulder 08:11
SHOULDER: Shedding time is our discovery Chasing crowns in the shinelight leaves the world crossing over me Asleep, we remain the dignified We steal to feel Oh, the carelessness of life So carefree How I love to see the sea and the sky The sky of a brand new day And how I love to hear the cries of a newborn baby child How I love to smell the blossoming flowers of spring How I love to touch the gleaming petals upon them How I love to taste what cannot be replaced What I love so much -- it cannot be taken away Please don't take it away A shoulder for my head I need a shoulder I need a shoulder for me to rest my head on Oh, the wings of life Floating, flying by Soaring with the winds to begin a new life reborn For this one lies tattered and torn, wounded and worn I see the sea and the sky I hear a newborn baby's cries I smell the blossoming flowers of spring I touch the gleaming petals upon them I taste what cannot be replaced What I love so much -- it cannot be taken away Please don't Please don't take it away, away...
13.
Sun 03:36
SUN: A spectrum of light descends from the heavens The rays pierce through the clouds And peace finds me in my easy chair Safely on the ground And I think you are falling up Gliding toward the sun The shattered wings of an eagle reflect the water Such a quiet and peaceful day The silence is perfect, and I can feel it in my bones So as the Lord is with me, I'll never be alone And I think you are falling up Gliding toward the sun And I think you are falling up Gliding toward the sun And I can only travel so many miles Before I start to circle around And I can only fly so high Before I start to fall back down again And I think you are falling up Gliding toward the sun And I think you are falling up Gliding toward the sun And I can only travel so many miles Before I start to circle around And I can only fly so high Before I start to fall back down again And I think you are falling up Gliding toward the sun
14.
Lucky Stars 05:52
LUCKY STARS: Mother, mother, I thank my lucky stars There's so much goodness in such a short time Mother, mother, I thank my lucky stars There's so much goodness in such a short time Mother, mother, I thank my lucky stars There's so much goodness in such a short time Mother, mother, I thank my lucky stars There's so much goodness in such a short time I am awash with receptivity For we have emerged from the other side Alert to these new sensations This gift we have been given is cleansed and purified Observing the implicit self A web of truth has been spun and will be preserved I am captivated by our promise And there is still so much left to be done The stars are out The lucky stars are smiling down This is not a dream We are here If we can get to the heart of our anger And keeping mindful, coax it to bloom And if we can get to the heart of emotion Get to each one, get into you Then we can get to the heart of the moment And live out each one from here to the moon I am mindful; I am here now And hate will not consume me We cradle, we hold and we transform each form of energy And grateful, we know that only we can set us free Mother, mother, I thank my lucky stars There's so much goodness in such a short time Mother, mother, I thank my lucky stars There's so much goodness in such a short time

about

A momentary focus on the acoustic sound.

"His lyrics are weighty, full of dichotomy and metaphors that aren't always easy to understand. What is clear is his heart is in this work."

- John Molseed, Pulse (from a review of "The Human Condition")

credits

released January 1, 2015

This album was written, performed, produced and recorded by Austin Taft.
Sleeve layout and design by Austin Taft and Aaron Listen.
Illustrations by Aaron Listen.

All songs recorded at The Reactor.
All songs (C)Austin Taft.
Published by Timewave Music Publishing (ASCAP).

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Austin Taft Colorado Springs, Colorado

Drummer/songwriter/multi-instrumentalist focused on making unique and intriguing music – whatever that should entail. The new album, “Skeletons”, has been self-described as “Prog-Metal-That-Sometimes-Isn't”. The album before that was acoustic-focused.
So...you never know what you're going to get (hopefully).
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